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Post by Feliciano Vargas on May 29, 2012 3:25:44 GMT -5
Luddi,
A rhetorical question, ve? It didn't sound like one... And even if it was one, Luddi, I still think that if you want something from someone, it's... best to just ask, eventually. After all... No matter how hard you think on something, you can't be sure what the answer is. unless it's the uncertainty that's getting to you like it is with me But Luddi!! I'm telling the truth! You are that amazing, even more amazing than I could ever say. And even though Kiku is mio amico I still say that he was stupid to not feel lucky over your affections for him. I truly believe that anyone would be and feel lucky that you cared for them. Oh... I-It was just surprising because of how nervous you still are around me. I-I was just a little worried I was overstaying my welcome and Luddi didn't have the heart to say anything. that's all, Luddi. Of course I would appreciate your company, Luddi! You're my closest person, ve! If I couldn't appreciate Luddi... then I wouldn't be able to appreciate anythin-- V-Ve? W-Why would Luddi say something like that? D-Does he know?? B-but... If he did, a-and he felt the same, would that be his way of saying... He doesn't feel the same, and wants to just be amici? Or... N-No, I'm probably reading too much into this... Grazie for that, Luddi. And I would support you just the same. But... Ve, even if I wanted to find love... I will be talk to Luddi about it first since he's the one I want love from anyway Ve, I know that they are my memories, not scenes of paintings or any sort of representation, but sometimes they're... Conflicting. Like despite thr scene or who I was with... Things are warped, as if someone else was there and I was doing something else. Like I did two different things in the same situation and they're starting to mix together-- ah, si!! That's almost how these feel too! Then again, during war... Are any of us ever in our right minds? B-But Luddi, I'm not being modest, false or otherwise... I'm sure that anyone can change their perception on life with enough determination. But even then if they can change with the help of friends and family, it doesn't make the change any less meaningful. I'm sure you would have let it go eventually. That we were all able to help you and that you still had the will to let it go, Luddi. Just that you had to feel like you could, a-at least that's what I think. And I'm really glad that I could do anything to help you at all. ...No, Luddi, I... I am very sure of it.
Well's glad you liked it so much then, Luddi. I'll do my best to keep the food light and only a little sweet. I hope that you still like breakfast and everything. Oh, well I'm glad that they hadn't gone away completely as well as that you liked it. Oh, no, they were freehand. That's probably why they fell apart so quickly... Either way I'm glad you liked them. Ve, it's a bit silly to think so but it's nice that we seem to have our own jobs, isn't it? I make breakfast, Luddi makes dinner... It's nice. I see... I never realized that was how it worked. I always thought that you were supposed to bore yourself to sleep by counting sheep. But distract you from wanting to sleep in order to sleep? It sounds a little like an oxymoron, ve. ............... C-Che cosa? M-Mi dispiace, Luddi, I-I think I misunderstood. Could you r-repeat that? N-No matter how many times I read that, I-I don't think I understand what you mean. Because if you were in some strange universe trying to hint what I think you're hinting then I would love each and every...workout you were talking about. Dio almighty I have to stop thinking like this... W-Well, I... Have no idea, Luddi... I-I mean... We don't want to damage anything, but... Ve, I really don't have any ideas because the idea of Luddi "working me up into tears" won't leave my head I haven't been playing with her as often as I had before this, so she probably wants attention... I'm glad she didn't damage the cord though. ...Ve? The question why bothers Luddi too? Why? ...Grazie, Luddi. I just...I-It's a bit hard, si? After spending so long not thinking about anything, not talking about it... After so long like that it's hard to talk about them. I need time to convince myself. Thank you for understanding. And...I will talk to you when I can. I promise. Si, plus with us all m-mostly getting along we don't really need to start fighting now... Peace is good, s-so it would be bad if it left so soon... Oh no, really? I-I know that thr situation is really not good but c-could he really end up like you had? That's really worrying. I hope everything will be alright... We will be able to see the signs now, so hopefully we'll be prepared if it did happen. Si, it was a bit surprising... Though it's also a little surprising that Luddi was so calm when he'd heard the theory. I mean, Luddi's smart enough to not think it's true but every nation I've seen always get a little worried over their first "end of the world" scare. ...Si, about Lovi and Luddi. I-I mean... Ve, I just... Don't know what to do, si? I... Veeee... I'm just... C-confused. And I don't know what to do about it. I don't want to ruin things again, Luddi. I-I don't. And I'm scared I will even though Joseph keeps telling me that things are fine a-and will s-stay fine, ve... Prego, Luddi... Please remember it. But... Veeeeee, I-I just c-can't help but worry... He always has this habit of pretending things he doesn't like didn't happen, o-or being so angry and mean to the people involved... How do I know he won't g-go back to how things between us used to be? He... I-I don't want that, Luddi. He's my brother, I-I still want him a-as family... But it doesn't even seem that I have much of that a-anyway... Maybe I'm just asking for too much. I know they love me, a-and sometimes they write... That should be enough for me, ve... No, really, Luddi, thank you. I...Ve, I don't even know how comfortable I'll be at home anymore... Just thinking a-about it makes me sad. H-How can I not even be comfortable with the idea of eventually being h-home? Veeeeeee... Si, for the most part. Papa wrote to me earlier and seemed sorry for not writing in so long but he's always been distant, so I don't know if I can even get my hopes up anymore... Oh... Don't think like that, Luddi... The past, no matter how bad, shapes us into who we are. And... I like Luddi the way he is. I'm just happy we're so close again too... even if I wish we could be closer... Si, you're welcome, Luddi, and grazie. That offer means a l-lot too, especially with everything... Ve? Self...chosen family? M-More than a close friend? I... Ve, that's really... I-I can't even explain how much that means to me, Luddi. I m-mean... I care so much about Luddi, so it makes me v-very happy to hear that. and it raises my h-hopes so much... Could it really be what I want, or... Just like family, but not? While I'm sure Luddi would still look good with white hair I really do prefer him with his pretty blonde hair so I'm happy he won't change it at least just yet. Didn't it?
I didn't know that either, but Gilbert could write to him if he wanted to without telling anyone. It would be his own business, after all... Ve, but Luddi, even if it seems unreasonable that doesn't mean he can't still be sad or worried by it. I just wish he would see that we still care for him just like his amici e famiglia do. Si, I do. And Joseph was so upset when he saw what it was. I don't like seeing Joseph so sad... Ve?? Luddi! I don't think you should be talking like that about him... I don't think sex would help him feel more accepted by his amici. I won't tell him though, don't worry. ... why do I keep thinking you're talking about sex? Veeeee... grazie, Luddi. I'm lucky to have an understanding person like Luddi in a situation like this... I know mi famiglia would be pestering me to tell them by now. I... I am really trying to get things thought through. I just... Si, I need time, like Luddi says. But I promise I will tell you. Luddi deserves to know. And I will wait until Luddi feels ready to tell me. I will trust Luddi though, I have always trusted him and I don't think there will be a time that I don't. At least for a very long time I will. To be honest...right now I don't think I ever will not be able to trust you. So, per favore, try not to worry about that. It's no problem. As Luddi said, how could I not be there for you when you don't want to be alone with him? I'm glad that I will be able to help you when you need me. Oh... I-I wish I could say something to help with that, but I don't know how in a way that you would believe. I just hope that someday you will feel at least comfortable with him again. But what will help the most is to not worry about that for now. We will reach that situation when it comes and you will have help when it does. Please just elremember that. I will be here, whenever you need me. well, I will do my best to be, even when my heart finally sinks...
Si, that's true, but still I didn't see as much of him as you'd think... I'm just happy to be close to him now. Ve, that's what he said as well, or at least something he hinted at. Caring older brother? W-Well, even if you and he both think he's not the best... He's the nicest I've ever had as a fratellone. No, Luddi, it's fine... The way I had said it does make is sound as if I were a "hug addict", or something similar. ...it's fine, v-ve... I probably hadn't made it easy to think my way a-at first. But thank you, ve. Just a-a few hugs now and then w-would be alright! Just not a-as much distance as we've had and I'll be fine, ve. Warn you...? I can do that!! I can, I promise! No more sneak-hugs. Not let me get away with it? Well~ what would you do then to "punish me"~?
True, true... I'm glad that we, w-well I was able to help the both of you then. Oh Luddi, I know he can't, I was just saying that with a bambino his age it was understandable that he tried. O-Oh dear... I hope you're exaggerating on that. ... Mi dispiace, I-I shouldn't have sounded accusing like that... I know Luddi is only concerned. I just...when there isn't another option, I-I just don't see what other choice I would have had. N-No, I've checked all over the house, everywhere I could think of... I-It's as if they vanished... Ve... Grazie for meting me sleep with you, b-but Luddi hadn't gotten much sleep then, had he? I-I'm sorry that I made Luddi feel so uncomfortable. A-And mi dispiace for n-not keeping my word. ....non, ve. I don't want to make Luddi feel awkward and unable to sleep. I-I don't want to be able to sleep w-well if Luddi c-can't because of it. So n-nom. There won't be a next time.
Feliciano
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Post by Ben Calteux on May 29, 2012 8:08:26 GMT -5
Dear Ludwig,
I am well to, thank you very much.
Ah... I have heard about that and it is such a shame. We really need everyone's governments to work together in order to solve this crisis.
Yours Truely,
Ben
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Post by ludwig on Jun 3, 2012 10:04:08 GMT -5
Liebe Astrid,
that is a good trait, please don’t give it up. God knows I understand that it hurts to lose a friend and that you want to hide from the rest of the world. But please don’t change your friendly nature. Danke, Astrid. Maybe, since Gilbert laughed every time he entered the living-room and smelled the beer. I know that this sounds odd coming from me of all people, but he can be such a child sometimes. Ja, I hoped that I could talk some things out with Francis, since his new boss seems to… well… enjoy disagreeing with my boss. But even if he was busy right now, he said he would try to open his inbox for other nations again soon*.
… I am sorry, Astrid. Can… I am sorry, I don’t know what to say… Is there anything I could do for you? Joseph will surely have nothing against it if you come here to join us in Munich when you don’t want to be alone now.
Viele Grüße Ludwig
-- * I hope it’s okay by Jen to say that. ^^;
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Post by ludwig on Jun 3, 2012 15:32:28 GMT -5
Lieber Feliciano,
i-it was really nothing more than a rhetorical question. … A-anyway,… Feliciano, would you m-mayb-… Oh Gott, I can’t just ask for something like that. How insolent and tactless would that be?! N-not to mention what would happen to our friendship if you said no. I could never look you in the eye again... I know that I can’t keep quiet forever, and actually it’s getting more difficult every single day, since I can hardly face you without blushing and stammering anymore, but… Just asking like that? Impossible. … Please stop it, Feliciano. I-I understood that you like me, but such high praises only give me people the wrong idea. … Vielen Dank and you are welcome. J-Ja, I would also let you know first or second after Gilbert. I understand. Well, it was a long time ago and as much as you have changed yourself, your view on your own memories has changed too. With my young age I can only imagine how it must feel with centuries old memories, when already my estimation of the memories I have from the wars has changed a lot. … That is a good question. During the war my mind was clear, I knew exactly what I was doing and I remember everything, but at the same time everything in my head is kind of blurry. Nein, Feliciano. Not everybody can change like that on their own and rather than having changed, I would have killed myself for real without your, my family’s and the Allies’ support.
Ja, I always like the food you prepare, Feliciano. That goes not only for the dishes themselves, but also the effort you take for the decoration and such. You are right, somehow we have found a plan to share the household chores without a word, be it about cooking, cleaning or doing the grocery shopping. It seems like we have become well attuned to each other, almost like an old coup- Oh mein Gott! What the hell am I writing there?! That is very out of place! Maybe it is a little of both, I have to admit. If you put it like that, it could be called an oxymoron, ja. … What…? I said that back then I used to exhaust you until you whimpere-… O-oh Gott…! … N-Nein! … Th-that has s-sounded quite wrong, hasn’t it…? I-I apologise, Feliciano. S-sorry! Oh nein…! Of c-course I was only talking about training. I am sorry that it sounded like s-something e-else. Oh je... That was not my intention. Sorry. Oh mein Gott! I will never get that wrongness out of my head again. ... There would be possible workouts like aerobic that we could to inside, but I guess you can imagine that I am not too fond of it, neither of senselessly running up and down the stairs a couple of times. The question why bothers me concerning Japan, I meant. But I would be interested in Romano’s motives too of course because I certainly can’t understand why he didn’t feel like the luckiest man on Earth to have your love. I understand and I am sorry that you had to keep your worries to yourself for so long, Feliciano. Whenever you are ready, I will gladly listen to you and support you in every way I can. You are not alone anymore. I agree and I hope that we can all keep getting along like we do now, aside from the occasional little arguments. Greece’s situation isn’t that bad yet fortunately, and I consider it very important to show him that he is not isolated and left alone with his problems. We will have to see the outcome of his next election. Why wouldn’t I have stayed calm? It was an ungrounded fear and I saw no reason to panic over it. It wasn’t my first “end of the world” scare too, since we had those at both turns of century I witnessed as well as on the 9th September 99. Sorry, Feliciano, but I don’t understand what you mean. It is hard to miss that you are confused and worried about something though. I don’t know what it is that troubles you like that, but I am convinced that you won’t “ruin things”, and especially not “again”. That Romano was unable to appreciate your feelings and/or to end your relationship in a civil way was certainly not your fault, and I highly doubt that the incident will repeat itself. … Thank you, I will remember it. Feliciano, please try to calm down. I understand your fears, but there is no point in getting worked up over them right now. It will probably be months before you see Romano again, since I won’t allow that reunion before you are prepared, so you can take your time to think about everything properly in peace. Romano is and always will be your brother. Just like in the past you will be able to work out your differences when some time has passed and you will be a family again. That goes also for your other siblings. Nein, Feliciano. It certainly isn’t asking too much when you want to stay in touch with them and there is no need to soft-pedal. … Everything will turn out all right, you will see. You don’t have to go home before you feel comfortable with the thought, Feliciano. Right now the thought of returning to Berlin and going back to my usual daily schedule makes me sad too, because they say home is where the heart is and I couldn’t feel comfortable in Berlin when you take my heart with you to Venice I enjoy the time we spend together in Munich too much to end it already. When I picked you up in Rome, I asked you if you want me to accompany you to Venice or if you wanted to come with me to Germany, and w-well… if you don’t want to go home alone yet, that offer still holds. You are right, I should try to think about it that way. In the end everything turned out well and who knows if I could value our friendship like this if we hadn’t had difficult times before. Y-you are welcome, I didn’t know that it meant so much to you… J-Ja,… I think “self-chosen family” describes it best after a certain other w-words that I d-don’t think I can use y-yet. We are not related, but still around you I feel at home for some reason, and accepted just the way I am which is something I only felt with my brothers so far. N-not to mention that you are dear and important to me, and I care about you more than I do about any other friend, so I guess you are more family to me than just a friend, albeit a different kind of family than my brothers because there are a few things that I would rather not do with them...
Naturally Gilbert is free to write to whoever he likes. It is just surprising to me that he gets along with Joseph’s best friend. Ja, you are right, but still I wonder where Joseph got that idea from. Even if I am admittedly not the one he shares his worries with, I can’t think of anyone distancing himself from Joseph. Well, except Scotland maybe when he sent him this potion, although I don’t know about the backgrounds. … Sorry, Feliciano. I didn’t mean it only sexually, but obviously Joseph misses someone who cares about him more than we do, and… when I think that he has erased his memories of Roderich, he probably can’t even remember having been in love or in a relationship at all. N-not at all, I am just as lucky that you are so understanding, Feliciano. That you put up with all my stammering and silence is nothing I could ever take for granted. … J-ja, I understand that you need time. Please take all the time you need, I won’t put pressure on you f-for example by imposing my f-feelings on you before you are over your hurt. Thank you, Feliciano. Your trust and honesty means a lot to me. N-no matter what the outcome will be, please promise me to be honest with me. I can take any answer as long as only you believe me and I can believe you too. Thank you. To know that I have your moral support reassures me a lot, Feliciano. Well, I hope that one day Japan and I will be able to get along again, but time will tell.
I understand, Joseph has probably always preferred to stay in his own country even back then. Na ja, most of the time he rather enjoys driving me up the wall than helping me out, so I am not used to his caring side. But I am glad that he is being nice to you and that you two get along not as glad as I should be though… All right, I am jealous,… b-but only a little. … Nein, I apologise, Feliciano. I should have kept in mind that this nearness is part of your culture and you wouldn’t feel comfortable without it. A-alright, let’s agree on a few hugs now and then, but with a warning pleas- To punish you…? … W-why does that sound like…? … W-well, I don’t know because I certainly can’t do what came to my mind first… Verdammt, I really won’t get that wrongness out of my head anytime soon, b-but I will have to think of something if you do it again.
I am thankful for your help too. He is a child, but as a personification he has to take responsibility and he should know better than to pass weird laws to get his will. I wish I were exaggerating. … But there was another option, wasn’t there…? I understand, well, it seems like the sleeping pills are no option anymore then. How do you…? … W-Well, ja… that is right, but I did get some sleep… just not nearly enough… Nein, Feliciano, d-don’t think that it was your fault. … T-the truth is… I haven’t slept with anyone since decades, actually when we slept together back then was the last time. I am not used to sharing a bed anymore and… it made me too nervous to fall asleep. But I can get accustomed to sleeping with you again, Feliciano. I am sure that after some more nights there won’t be a problem. Give me another chance… please?
Liebe Grüße, Ludwig
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Post by Astrid Moreau on Jun 3, 2012 16:40:03 GMT -5
Lieber Ludwig,
I will try not to, but it is hard, he was the last friend I made.
Ja, he can be a child, and I would say that is a good reason to say he liked it.
Talking would be good, hopefully ithe disagreements don't become too serious. I would like that if he did, I miss talking to him.
Its- it's alright. I am just glad that I can talk to you. As much as I would love to come see all you again, Alfred has invited me to come to his country for a while, so I should be leaving in a few days. Lorraine has agreed to take care of my work for longer and will let me know if she needs my help.
I hope that everything is going well for all of you in Munich.
Astrid
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Post by ludwig on Jun 4, 2012 4:35:29 GMT -5
Lieber Ben,
that is good to hear.
Ja, I agree on that. In difficult times the last thing we need is adding to our problems with minor arguments. But as you know it is not easy to make everybody work together, when some nations apparently consider our meetings,... I don't even know what they consider them, maybe a kindergarten or arena...
Viele Grüße, Ludwig
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Post by ludwig on Jun 8, 2012 11:54:17 GMT -5
Liebe Astrid, ja, I understand. Your family and friends will help you overcome this hard time, Astrid. And better times will come for sure. Talking things out as soon as possible is undoubtedly the best solution, but it doesn't mean that we run risk to worsen our diplomatic relations considerably. They haven't always been as good as under Mitterand and Kohl*, but since the end end of the War I believe that we have become good friends. We will surely get the opportunity to see each other again soon. I wish you a good time in America. Alfred is good with cheering people up, helping them get through a rough time and overcome a depression. He also helped me a lot back then.Thank you. We are all doing well, aside from Joseph's spell of depression and the fact that it's getting harder and harder for me to look Feliciano in the eye. Viele Grüße, Ludwig -- * Mitterand (French president) and Kohl (German chancellor) have become good friends. Their most famous moment was the remembrence ceremony for the victims of Verdun (WW I) polpix.sueddeutsche.com/polopoly_fs/1.408587.1273513110!/image/image.jpg_gen/derivatives/900x600/image.jpg
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Post by Ben Calteux on Jun 10, 2012 21:21:39 GMT -5
Dear Ludwig,
Ja, I know the feeling. Just now I had to yell at my brudder to start doing his own paperwork and not to force me to do it like Sadiq suggested I should do. But then Lars got a bit mad at me and lets just say that because of his immaturity, I am doing more of his paperwork... *sighs*
I really wish that he would stop doing this... Lars can be such a child sometimes!
Yours Truely,
Ben
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Post by Astrid Moreau on Jun 11, 2012 16:15:35 GMT -5
Lieber Ludwig
I am thankful to all of you, just hearing from you all as made it easier, and so has time.
It is good to see two that I look up to getting along so well, it mearly proves to show that anything is possible. Countries fight as friends do, but as long as they can work it, that's whats important.
I hope so, it has been years since I have seen you. Maybe once I get back from America I can come see you, once you get things sorted out there that is, I don't want to inturrupt. I'm sure it will be fun, he seems like a fun guy who could make anyone laugh.
Oh, now I understand his surprise at being called family...I hope he gets over it soon. I hate to see anything the matter with by bruders.
Astrid
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Post by Feliciano Vargas on Jun 14, 2012 15:12:48 GMT -5
Teso-- ... T-Tes-- Tesor-- .... Luddi,
If Luddi says so... Ve? Would I maybe what, Luddi? How can I answer if you don't finish your question? You can ask, Luddi, whatever it is. I want Luddi to feel like he can ask me anything without worry, ve. ...Luddi, I do mean it though, every word. I can give Luddi whatever high praises I want, because I am telling the truth. I don't care what other people think of it. I mean every word I say with all the honesty I have. Maybe it's just that... Though I can remember things from far before then with really strong clarity, so... Maybe it's just because of the wars themselves. Oh, Luddi, you early memories are still centuries old, ve. Or nearly two, which is still a long time for a memory to last. I thought my mind was clear at first too, but...after a few years I couldn't seem to think anymore, so I think we just...weren't all there at the time, even if it felt like we were. ...Ve, I see... But even if it is help from others, being able to change into a better person is still a good thing. And I'm...glad to be the person I am now, just like I'm glad that Luddi is who he is as well.
That's good~ I'm really glad that Luddi enjoys it all. Ve, I know that so long as food tastes good and is relatively good for you it shouldn't matter too much what it looks like, but I think that if you make food look really pretty people are more likely to eat it. Si, we have, isn't it interesting? I've never really had an understanding like this with anyone before, it's really nice to share the work without having to worry about it, ve. I've just always been in charge of things like that. The (inter)national work, the groceries, the cooking, the cleaning... It's nice to share the work. S-Si, it sounded very...suggestive. N-Not that it wasn't...untrue at one point, I-I was just really c-confused, ve. Oh, no, Luddi, you don't need to apologize. I m-mean, I know you hadn't meant it that way. Oh, Luddi...speaking of something we could do inside... Luddi was saying before, a-a while before, to be honest, but... anyway, Luddi said he had never learnt how to dance, so... We could do that. I could teach you how to dance. If Luddi wants to learn, anyway. Most people never really ballroom dance anymore outside of competitions, but I think it's fun a-and it can be a serious workout when you're learning new choreography and such... So if we can't think of anything else, we could t-try that. Oh, si si, mi dispiace for misunderstanding. Si, I don't understand Kiku's reasoning either... I just... Ve, I hope that Luddi gets his answers, once he feels he can talk to Kiku again. Grazie, I...will do my best to talk to you about these things, Luddi, I will. Grazie for being so patient with me. I know that I haven't been the most....w-well, I know I haven't been the easiest person to deal with with all my worries and such, and I'm really sorry. I know I'm not alone anymore. I have Luddi. Ve, that sounds like what I'd like too. I mean, little arguments still aren't the best but you can't ever help those, especially since some of us seem to argue for fun and there are some cultural differences...but it would be nice for things to be as peaceful as possible, ve. That's good... I hope he doesn't think he is, because he has all of us there for him. And I hope that things will be alright. Oh, si, that's true... Ve, I just wondered because all of the nations, including myself, that I've seen over their first few end-of-the-world scares and...it never was very pretty. Lots of panic, ve. I just....Mi dispiace, Luddi, I'm trying not to let this all bother me. I'm figuring out a little more though and.... If I could talk to Luddi about this, it would help a-a lot. Ve, Luddi, I-- ...nevermind. I might just be...overthinking, si? Putting blame where it doesn't go. I just can't help but think that way. Bene, ve. I don't want to be scared of this, Luddi. Really, I don't. I know he's mio fratello, and that I shouldn't be scared of these things like I am, but I can't help it... Ve, grazie, Luddi. I just wonder how long it will take this time...and how long that peace will last. You'd think that were the case, wouldn't you? I thought so too, but it seems like it is too much to ask, ve. I don't want to bother them when they're worrying about work anyway. Plus...writing to them makes me feel like I did something wrong coming up here anyway, and by insisting that they keep writing to me. So....maybe for now it's time to give us all a little break or something, si? Writing to my family should make me happy, not sad or upset. Ve, everything feels...better when I'm spending time with Luddi anyway, so I'm sure you're right. Well, Luddi, if I don't have to go home just yet, then I want to stay with you. Either here, in Berlin, Venezia...anywhere so long as it's with Luddi. Si, that's how I think about it now, even though I wasn't the nicest nation in the world back in the day. But you need all of the bad along with the good, to regret one it to regret all and, as I said...I lo--like Luddi just the way he is. Ve...I'm very happy that Luddi feels so comfortable with me. I don't see any reason to not accept Luddi the way he is, and I'm glad that because of that Luddi is happy with spending time with me because of it. ...Those are very sweet words, Luddi, grazie. I care about Luddi just the same. He means the world to me.
Ve, I wasn't expecting it either...though it was more on Hamish's side than Gilbert's that I had expected the animosity. At Hamish's party last year he and Gilbert were rather nasty to each other, though most of it came from Hamish if I remember correctly... I don't know either, ve. Something about some of his close siblings not writing, obviously the situation with Hamish, some of his sister-states, Alfred, and eventually us once we fall in lo-- I-I mean, once we either go to Berlin together or us going our s-separate ways for now. ... Ve, that's...sad to think about. But there's no way that we could help him with that, is there? I....want him to be happy too, ve. T-Then we are both lucky, it seems. Oh, Luddi, I know that you don't mean the stammering or silences, so why would I do anything when not accepting them would just make things awkward, or bad between us? I...will do my best-- Ve? But Luddi's not putting any pressure on me at all, so don't worry about anything. Plus...I've been thinking more, and... I-I think LUddi and I need to talk sometime soon. Of course Luddi would have my support. And that is in everything, Luddi, not just this one time with Kiku. Si...time will tell.
I'm not sure, ve. I just didn't spend time with many people but Lovi and Nonno Roma when I was very little, and a lot of the time I spent most of my time in my own nation as well. The only times I didn't were when I was under someone else's control, like Mr. Roderich and Fratellone Francis, and most of that time I was doing too many chores to really socialize with anyone who came to see either of them. Ve...That's what he said too, but... I feel very happy that Joseph is nice to me, too. But it's also not part of Luddi's and it would have and did make him uncomfortable, ve. Si si, with warnings. Ohhh~ Ve, does that mean that Luddi needs another surprise-hug to spur his thinking on a little~?
Si, he is a bambino, and he will think like one. While he does have to take responsibility as a representation like we do, he's also only a very small boy, barely old enough for school. Taking responsibility and not passing weird laws would be very difficult for him with his mindset. ...Oh dear... that's not good at all, ve.
...Would you really think that sleeping together was really an option at the beginning, ve? You'd been so nervous about touching that it wasn't an option at all. Ve, Luddi, do you know why my pills were in the cabinet with the extra soaps? ...Oh, I see, ve. Just...not used to sharing a bed. I-I can understand why that would make it hard to sleep... If Luddi really thinks he can get accustomed to it since we went years during the wars with you yelling at me every turn, I don't know if you'll really be able to get used to it like you say so...though I would like it if you could then we can...try again. Si, I can give Luddi another chance, e-even though it's not a bad thing t-that you would need a 'second chance' for...
...Con tanto amore*, Feliciano
--- *"All my love" in Italian
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Post by ludwig on Jun 15, 2012 0:31:07 GMT -5
Lieber Ben,
that you yelled talked to your bother about this, is a good thing. I am sorry to hear that it didn't work out in your favour. Do you want me to have a word with him? I doubt that he would exactly welcome me after wednesday's football game, but well. Yes, unfortunately I can't deny that, since he has proven his immaturity two days ago as well.
Viele Grüße, Ludwig
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Post by ludwig on Jun 15, 2012 0:44:25 GMT -5
Liebe Astrid,
I take it that you are feeling a little better again now. That is a relief. If there should be anything you need, you can always contact me.
Well,... ja, I agree. It was good to bury this old rivalry and join our forces to create a better future. Let's hope that Francis and I can keep it up despite the new developments.
Has it really been years already...? Time passes so fast... That is a good idea, I would be glad to see you again as well. Sorted things out...? W-what do you mean, y-you don't know about t-that, do you...? Alfred has his serious side too, that he unfortunately shows on too little occasions, but you are right about his contagious positivity.
Hopefully Joseph gets better soon. I am a little worried, since he seems to be plotting something secretly, and with my older brothers secret plottings usually don't end well.
Viele Grüße, Ludwig
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Post by ludwig on Jun 15, 2012 1:55:33 GMT -5
…
Liebe-... A new address...? Himmel, my Italian isn't that good... Where is the dictionary? ...
Lieber Felician-ooooh my God... T-tes... There a-are not m-many Italian words with “teso”... F-Feliciano... What...? Y-you couldn't mean “teso” (tense), I assume. B-but... “t-tesoro”... N-nein... No, no way... No, that has to be wishful thinking... No... But what if... Nein! Don't be silly, Ludwig! … Verdammt, what the hell am I writing here?! …
Lieber Feliciano, …
Liebs-ster Feliciano, …
Hello Feli-... That's ridiculous... …
Lieber Feliciano, … No, I can't just pretend nothing had... T-that is too little... …
Liebster Feli-.... And that is too much... He w-would assume that... …
Lieber Feliciano, … Oh, verdammt! Scheiß drauf! ... ... Liebster Feliciano,
… w-well... all r-right, if you say so I will ask, but... I hope you don't think l-less of me then... Uhm... I wanted to ask if y-you would m-maybe g-go out with me on a... r-real d-date... V-verdammt, that is way too blunt to say!! … accept my fee- … take into consideration to deepen our relationsh-... Scheiße, that sounds weirder than weird! ... allow me to k- Scheiße, verdammt...! That's out of q-question … still think the one I offer my affections to is lucky when it's you ... I am sorry, Feliciano. Apparently I am not good with words in this regard and I am not sure if this will come out the way I intended, but... W-what I want to ask is... what would you t-think if I told you t-that my feelings for you a-are more than f-friendship and that... verdammt...! Man up and say it...! latelyIhavebeenonervousinyourpresencebecauseitmakesmyheartracelikecrazyandthatwheneveryoutouchmeIfeelbutterfliesinmystomachandthatby"selfchosenfamily"IrathermeantthatIwasfallinginlovewithyouthanthatIviewedyouasabrotherlybestfriendandthatIdon'tknowwhattodowhenyouhavetogobackhomesomeday... but that I don't know how to tell you, and that I am afraid to lose your friendship when I do...? … M-my apologies, I don't know how to say this at all...
J-ja, you are right. You and I... we need to talk.
In L-Liebe ... Freundschaft … … Liebe, Ludwig
--- verdammt – damn Scheiß drauf – fuck it Scheiße – shit … Luddi's wording is getting better and better... xD In Liebe – with love
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Post by Feliciano Vargas on Jun 15, 2012 3:42:02 GMT -5
...Ve...? This paper is covered in scribbles... I wonder why...
T-Tesor-- Tes-- You can do this, ve! You ended with Con tanto amore, so you c-can do this... ...Tesoro Luddi,
Ve, don't worry. I wouldn't think less of you at all... Ve, there are even more crossed out lines... What on Earth is Luddi so worried about? Not good with the words? I'm a bit confused, ve, you're usually quite good with words. What would I think if you're saying... But Luddi's already said that I am more than a friend to hi-- ... What on earth? I can hardly read that... Luddi is asking... "What would I think if Luddi told me that his feelings for me are mor than friendship and that lately he has been too nervous in my...presence because it makes his...heart race like c-crazy? And that whenever I touch him...Luddi feels b-butterflies in his stomach and that...by "self chosen family" he meant that he was... F-Falling in love with m-me?? Rather than that Luddi viewed me as a brotherly best friend...and that Luddi doesn't know what to do when I have...to go back home someday..." O-O-Oh Dio... I-I need a chair, I-I can't b-believe-- Joseph was right... Joseph was right he was right he was right!! Luddi...please, Luddi, don't ever t-think that our friendship c-could be lost because of t-this... I m-mean... W-Wanting to be closer to Luddi these past months...hasn't b-been purely platonic o-on my side... I...have only become as well as I-I have...and worried as much as I have b-because I care so much about Luddi. As m-more than friends. As...different from fratelli. I... V-Ve, I'll...leave my actions to say my words f-for me, Luddi. A-And even though I h-had just promised to warn Luddi first... T-This time I can't help myself. As I've said...a-actions speak louder t-than every word in the world, sometimes...
But...just in case Luddi doesn't b-believe me d-despite all that... Anch io...t-ti amo, Ludwig. Ti amo tantissimo, significhi tutto per me. ...Non voglio perderti.
...Sei il sole della mia vita.*
Con tanto amore, Feliciano
--- Anch io ti amo, Ludwig: I love you too, Ludwig. Ti amo tantissimo, significhi tutto per me: I love you so much, you mean everything to me. Non voglio perderti: I don't want to lose you. Sei il sole della mia vita: You are the sunshine of my life.
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Post by ludwig on Jun 15, 2012 5:13:47 GMT -5
Liebster Feliciano,
... h-heilige Maria Mutter Gottes...! You almost g-gave me a heart-attack earlier! T-that tackling came out of nowhere and... S-sorry for freaking l-like that. ... H-have you calmed down again a b-bit? ... Sorry, at first I thought m-my letter had upset you... made you cry and I thought... B-but... uhm... I-I assume that I can interprete... th-that reaction... as a sign... of consent... I-it felt like my heart would jump out of my chest,... b-but... somehow I think I have n-never felt so good... I th-think I can get used to your kisses and squeezes...
Oh Gott! I have never been so happy that Gilbert has talked me into doing something... or that he was right. I have to thank him later.
Ja, that was what I wanted to say, Feliciano. T-the last months showed me how precious every second is that we spend together, and that I c-can't let you go again. I want to spend much more time with you, interrupt our work to walk the dogs hand in hand, hold you in my arm when we fall asleep and see your face first when I wake up the next morning, quarrel about stupid little things and make up again... No matter what the future may bring, you are and will always be the most important person to me. P-please stay with me. Ich liebe dich, Feliciano. Ti amo.
In Liebe, Ludwig
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